Many are confused between the feeling of lust or love. Or maybe the brain shuts our thinking cap when we are with someone we are attracted to. Studies have shown that the brain releases a set of chemicals that leads to how we think,act ... lust is defined as the initial passionate sexual desire and it does not last more than months or even weeks. Thus the reason why relationship should not be based on lust as lust dont last and in turn the relationship dont last. Some may argue that certain feelings of attraction physically is unavoidable and intimacy is what pops in their mind. Hence, the display of affection that we now see in this modernised and more liberalised society we live in. It can also be known as PDA(public display affections).
Not everyone is of accepting of this PDA and they have their own reasons. In addition, the way one is brought up also determines their lifestyle consciously or sub-consciously. Nonetheless, many feel that without intimacy, the relationship is dull and of no oomph! less that they know that when one loves the other, their forms of expressing these differs. The degree of love one expresses is not entirely based on physically, it is deeper than that.
One tends to overlook the beauty of attachment or bonding that lust can never live up to it. If one takes time to understand that there's more to physical affection and venturing in a relationship based on lust solely wont last. It takes two to tango as many have heard. Hence, communication and mutual understanding that many dread tends to be the pillars of a relationship. There are many more where that came from. Ultimately, it's undeniable that the feeling of lust is being experienced, it then boils down to self-control and discipline. Some may then argue that this is nature and no matter how hard we try to control, it does not work.
We are afterall humans..
"love is deeper than pure lusts"
lavender
Friday, February 12, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
losing the essence of Education
AAA!!!
These are the familiar letters for many since young. Eager parents sending their young children as early as 5 years old to various classes in the hopes for their children to get good grades. Many are now driven to get good grades. Ultimately, their aim is to get as many As. The process of learning seems to be blurry.
Back in our parent's time, a typical recess will have students chatting over who has the most rubber bands, marbles...
Now, we hear many talking about the difficulties of getting good grades and talk with full of zest that without good grades, it's the end. Or, we have some who says that even chatting during recess is a waste of time and should be utilised for education. It's nothing wrong in us to be competitive, ambitious and getting good results. However, the issue is, we seldom see one who pursue education for EDUCATION no more, instead, many just pursue the PAPER QUAlification(the grade A). Sadly to say, the essence of learning is thus lost in many youths.
The feeling of upset is natural when one is face with setback like getting poor results. This will drives them to achieve better results. This is the process that many view lightly. One says that the route to success is having failure as a stepping stone. However, when one takes the grades as the ultimate thing in life,there's no more diversity and leads to a monotonous and homogenity in life. There were instances where we find students taking their own life upon getting poor results.
Is this a matter of own discipline or is the fighting for education has gone out of control?
It boils down to the individuals for their own actions and how they find meaning in life and how they view education. Nonetheless, the society plays a part in how these individuals makes decisions in life or how they view things.
let's hope that the future is full of colours and diversification where many are venturing out in new things and find more learning meaningful and everyday is a learning experience to us.
"losing the drive serves no direction, losing the essence of life, is like losing a life"
-lavender-
These are the familiar letters for many since young. Eager parents sending their young children as early as 5 years old to various classes in the hopes for their children to get good grades. Many are now driven to get good grades. Ultimately, their aim is to get as many As. The process of learning seems to be blurry.
Back in our parent's time, a typical recess will have students chatting over who has the most rubber bands, marbles...
Now, we hear many talking about the difficulties of getting good grades and talk with full of zest that without good grades, it's the end. Or, we have some who says that even chatting during recess is a waste of time and should be utilised for education. It's nothing wrong in us to be competitive, ambitious and getting good results. However, the issue is, we seldom see one who pursue education for EDUCATION no more, instead, many just pursue the PAPER QUAlification(the grade A). Sadly to say, the essence of learning is thus lost in many youths.
The feeling of upset is natural when one is face with setback like getting poor results. This will drives them to achieve better results. This is the process that many view lightly. One says that the route to success is having failure as a stepping stone. However, when one takes the grades as the ultimate thing in life,there's no more diversity and leads to a monotonous and homogenity in life. There were instances where we find students taking their own life upon getting poor results.
Is this a matter of own discipline or is the fighting for education has gone out of control?
It boils down to the individuals for their own actions and how they find meaning in life and how they view education. Nonetheless, the society plays a part in how these individuals makes decisions in life or how they view things.
let's hope that the future is full of colours and diversification where many are venturing out in new things and find more learning meaningful and everyday is a learning experience to us.
"losing the drive serves no direction, losing the essence of life, is like losing a life"
-lavender-
The First
Everyone has their firsts in life. Even in How I met your mother in Ep1, the 9yrs couple sought to find their firsts.. There's no doubt that the feeling of getting the firsts is undescribable. It could be anything. Ranging from the first kiss, first branded shoes or even to the first fight.
The memories that stuck in our mind is greatly impacted when we encounter our FIRSTS.
Many are driven to have the perfect firsts. WE determine how the firsts starts and ends.
Imagining typical boys meeting behind the school corridor to have their first fight, the thoughts that ran through their minds differ and indeed the process is experienced differently.
Having the very first paycheck that gives us the satisfaction of being independant, more superior ad whatnots. Owning the First Jimmy Choos or Vera Wang dress may be toxic to some.
Or the typical lovebirds enjoying their first kiss as the sun sets.
In life, everyone experiences the FIRST in everything.. It gives the feeling of achieving something new, embarking in a new journey or just a simple first.
Nonetheless, there are some who seem not to bother the firsts as something impactful or of significant. However, sub-consciously for these people, the firsts do matters, just in a different way..
"The first may not be perfect but it gives the satisfaction of achieving something new in life"
-lavender-
The memories that stuck in our mind is greatly impacted when we encounter our FIRSTS.
Many are driven to have the perfect firsts. WE determine how the firsts starts and ends.
Imagining typical boys meeting behind the school corridor to have their first fight, the thoughts that ran through their minds differ and indeed the process is experienced differently.
Having the very first paycheck that gives us the satisfaction of being independant, more superior ad whatnots. Owning the First Jimmy Choos or Vera Wang dress may be toxic to some.
Or the typical lovebirds enjoying their first kiss as the sun sets.
In life, everyone experiences the FIRST in everything.. It gives the feeling of achieving something new, embarking in a new journey or just a simple first.
Nonetheless, there are some who seem not to bother the firsts as something impactful or of significant. However, sub-consciously for these people, the firsts do matters, just in a different way..
"The first may not be perfect but it gives the satisfaction of achieving something new in life"
-lavender-
Monday, June 15, 2009
Local guys or foreigners?
Local guys or foreign guys?
It all boils down to what do you want..objectives in life..goals..aspirations..
It has been through hearing from friends' experiences that local guys(LG) are still learning the ropes of how to make them melt and feel more appreciated. LG on the other hand argues that the girls nowadays just have high expectations in life. And there are another group who are just lucky enough to find their other half and satisfied with that.Kudos to you.
Most foreign guys (FG) seems to be able to sweep girls off the ground with their gentleman acts, caring ways. Even if LG says that they are probably just "using" the girls just to have fun.hmm.arent the LG the same?. "Using" may seem as a harsh word. No one seems to embrace this fact that guys are still guys. It is the extra factor they possess they makes them a unique individual.
Most girls ultimately whether they deny it or not, wants to feel wanted, appreciated, loved and understood as they all comes in different sizes, colours, background, status.....
Some even love living in fantasies.
Ladies who feel more secure and do not want to live in another country may settle with LG and there is nothing wrong in that. Like mentioned it all goes down to what do YOU want in life..
LG or FG, they are still guys. Different ladies view them in a different angle, based on different experiences. Some root for LG, others root for FG. Which is better? Only you knows..
"Matters of heart is complicated, but never stop many from falling in love"
-lavender-
It all boils down to what do you want..objectives in life..goals..aspirations..
It has been through hearing from friends' experiences that local guys(LG) are still learning the ropes of how to make them melt and feel more appreciated. LG on the other hand argues that the girls nowadays just have high expectations in life. And there are another group who are just lucky enough to find their other half and satisfied with that.Kudos to you.
Most foreign guys (FG) seems to be able to sweep girls off the ground with their gentleman acts, caring ways. Even if LG says that they are probably just "using" the girls just to have fun.hmm.arent the LG the same?. "Using" may seem as a harsh word. No one seems to embrace this fact that guys are still guys. It is the extra factor they possess they makes them a unique individual.
Most girls ultimately whether they deny it or not, wants to feel wanted, appreciated, loved and understood as they all comes in different sizes, colours, background, status.....
Some even love living in fantasies.
Ladies who feel more secure and do not want to live in another country may settle with LG and there is nothing wrong in that. Like mentioned it all goes down to what do YOU want in life..
LG or FG, they are still guys. Different ladies view them in a different angle, based on different experiences. Some root for LG, others root for FG. Which is better? Only you knows..
"Matters of heart is complicated, but never stop many from falling in love"
-lavender-
Could a traditional woman with a dash of modernity lives in this modernized world?
Well, many shows have expressed that the ideal woman is someone who cooks, take care of their kids and husbands, clean up well, looks good, caring, understanding and the lists goes on. What is the difference between traditional women and the modern women. Many says it lies in the lifestyle they lives in. Party, clubbing, smoking, sex? well,it has been happening since back then but now,it seems that it has been increasing (women).
In a battle to get the dream guy or even a guy, who stands to "win"? The traditional mindset gal or the fun, party-goers most modern gal? It seems that too often the traditional gal are talked as an ideal one but facts remains that so far guys have been going for the other one. No offense to modern woman . They are what they are.
A young single lady who spends most of her time with her family does not means she is not outgoing, and someone who has no life. Well, life is defined differently to different people. Girls out there who are "forced" to be who they are not so as to get their "dream guy" are too many nowadays.Many girls have had their first kiss, first this and that but what about those who dont? Does it mean they are left behind? It's subjective. Everyone have their basic principles in life,religion and all, so opinions on such matters are debatable.
What seems as unfair is that why do most guys "use" some girls as their back-up plans?
Meaning, they knew some girls will make a good wife etc etc but dont make a good girlfriend...But ended up going back to the girl after having much fun.Hmm. Sounds interesting may i say.
So can a traditional women lives?Oh yes they can but with hearts broken thanks to guys who does not know how to appreciate their uniqueness. Well, not all are like this, there are many happy endings but debatable in the startings. :)
"Be for who you are and not what others want you to be"
-lavender-
In a battle to get the dream guy or even a guy, who stands to "win"? The traditional mindset gal or the fun, party-goers most modern gal? It seems that too often the traditional gal are talked as an ideal one but facts remains that so far guys have been going for the other one. No offense to modern woman . They are what they are.
A young single lady who spends most of her time with her family does not means she is not outgoing, and someone who has no life. Well, life is defined differently to different people. Girls out there who are "forced" to be who they are not so as to get their "dream guy" are too many nowadays.Many girls have had their first kiss, first this and that but what about those who dont? Does it mean they are left behind? It's subjective. Everyone have their basic principles in life,religion and all, so opinions on such matters are debatable.
What seems as unfair is that why do most guys "use" some girls as their back-up plans?
Meaning, they knew some girls will make a good wife etc etc but dont make a good girlfriend...But ended up going back to the girl after having much fun.Hmm. Sounds interesting may i say.
So can a traditional women lives?Oh yes they can but with hearts broken thanks to guys who does not know how to appreciate their uniqueness. Well, not all are like this, there are many happy endings but debatable in the startings. :)
"Be for who you are and not what others want you to be"
-lavender-
Friday, November 14, 2008
OBS!...fun...tiring...crazy....MEMORABLE!
In life, we should not just confine ourself to what we are comfortable in(comfort zone). If I were to withdraw myself from the OBS camp, there will a lot of great experience and friends-making that I were to miss. Personally, I felt that due to my current condition, I may not be able to withstand the tough conditions in OBS(mobile) but as my will "to try everything there is in the world" and never to lose out in anything even though deep down I'm damn scared of a lot of things" seeps into me, I went!
And there I was in a group called ENG SOON! Our group comprises of a fusion of students from MI. All of us have different personality, strengths. We realises the importance of working out differences and tap on our strengths to achieve greater heights!Oh yar, not forgetting our tanned, tall instructor Haizul(Bangla!!haaha)..Well, although we kept teasing him and all(esp me), he is indeed a great instructor who allows us have the opportunity to break out of our comfort zone and explore different things. His guidance is done interestingly and always ends up in quotes or story.
DAY ONE
We were all divided into two groups- Eng Soon and Bo Seng..My group Eng Soon consists of 16 unique individuals. Went to our first campsite and settle our stuff at the storeroom. Started to pack our tents, ponchos etc. We had our very first cooked dinner made by us. It was a well done cooked rice, chicken curry, peanuts, mushrooms with baked beans and a quench-thirst drink of TANGO(energy drink)Then we went for our first challenge! High element. It was about 7 logs horizontally lying and going upwards. My partner in crime is Fathona and our lovely belayers were Hafiz and Zul.(thanks guys).We managed to reach to the top(with some difficulties at the last log but everyone cheered me on with ANUAR ZAIN name!lol) and I made my victory cheerleading stand,haha.Then, I had my first mosquito bite. Guess where?? It was at my eye lid,haha..Next, set out to our 2nd campsite in the forest. The "toilet" is a first class one where we have to dig out a small hole on the ground and do it there,in between two lightsticks.hhee. Our tent mates are me,Fathona,Nurul,Mitch and Cheryl!
Energy rating: 6.5/10
Fun Rating: 6/10
Comfort Rating: 5/10
DAY TWO
We started to pack our tent and go back to our first campsite where I release all my neccessary stuffs,haha. Then we had our morning PT and energizers games, I was so hyped up and crazy playing the worm game,haha..Was in the semi-final,cheh!haha..Then I lost and accidentally shouted "Mak kau"(I dont meant it in a vulgar way,everyone started to tease me with that,including ppl I dont know)Then we had our first morning circles where there were reflections and sharing by all of us. There, we realises that the Yr 1 and Yr2s are like somewhat separated hence Haizul suggest that some of us could be the catalyst for the group. He then shared us a nice and interesting piece with the title "Mirror". By the way, the morning circle was held at a big ship(on land,okay,haha) like the one at the Pirates of the Carribbean!(JOHNNY DEPP-Captain Jack Sparrow!!)..
Followed by 2 games about problems. One is a game where there were many strings of different lengths(representing the many suggestions a group has) attached to a metal ring(represent a problem). The next one was a a plastic bag with quite a few of holes (representing the problems) and a ball which is to circle around the problem without dropping into the problem-hole..
We had a jotter book to write in our objectives, rules and regulations and most of us started to use the magic pens, markers etc to decorate our shoe, caps(including me)..
Then, we got ready for our sea expedition which is kayaking for about 5km to reach to our next campsite at Jelutong. My parner-in-crime is Fathona and she is a great teacher to me and patient too.thanks!..Then we set up our tent and went to the long-distance toilet. The water was murky-brownish coloured but who cares?haaha. Then we went back and ate a dinner cooked by our lovely friends-Maggie Mee with many ingredients. We washed the dishes at the sea.Me,fathona,Nurul and Maria felt like the traditional ladies washing back then,haha..sexy!..
Then, we went to sleep where I had my first encounter with sandflys and mosquito bites(not that many though). We had our santry duty from 430am to 530am, we girls sat down on a poncho and started to share our thoughts. Mitch- future successful lawyer,Cheryl- working at the RSAF or an accountant, Fathona- newscaster(me too!haha..) Nurul- still deciding but wish her all the best too!..
Energy rating:8/10
Fun Rating:7.5/10
Comfort Rating:4/10
DAY THREE
We set out for our another set of sea expedition which is about 13km kayaking around Pulau Ubin. It was crazy,tiring but indeed a great fun!..Our kayak(Fathona and myself) were the in charge of the port side, ensuring that no one crosses our boundary and hit the coastline or anything and we had another port side peeps which is Mila and Sumi. Our lovely navigator was Shawn, starboard side were Zul and Hamizah and our sweeper was Reeka.
We had some difficulties encountered as a whole in the beginning of the expedition(switching of partners, kept rafting up etc).. The weather was so scorchingly hot babeh,haha. I kept putting on sun screen especially on my face until that "Banglah" Haizul teased me la.Some called me "geisha tak menjadi"(geisha with no hope.haha). We had our lunch at the sea as well,it was funny and crazy because we had to raft up and attached to the speedboat but we kept drifting due to the waves.haha..
Then we continued and sand along the way,any songs we know we "hantam"(just sing) and this includes singing school song, national day songs.haha. We were suppose to reach by 130pm but we reached around 2sthpm..As we reached the land, it started to rain HEAVILY!..Thank God..Now I have a new tanline but my face were(alhamdulilah) saved,haha..but it looks funny as a combination though!haha..
Then we washed up at our first campsite and all of us felt "unstable" in the sense that we felt like swaying(due to kayaking so long). We had a dinner cook-off,it was fun and crazily crazy..haha..It was ENG SOON CUISINE! Then we shared the food with our lovely Bo Seng!..
The rain didnt stop and we went to a room to learn about Johari's Window(OPEN,BLIND,HIDDEN and UNKNOWN). Then we talked about car parts and how we relates to it. I chose the steering wheel.hehe.. ENG SOON came up with an identity of "AN EYE" where we see through differences and work towards a common objectives!(Maria inspired the identity due to the fact that 3/4 of ENG SOONers wear specs,haha)..
This followed by a mini game where two individual are to walk through the dark forest without any torchlights or any forms of lights-tests our courage and integrity as well. It was not bad,Fathona and me went and when we were hiking up a trail, Fathona realises there were stairs on the left side of our trail,haha..We reached our destination is 6.07mins(i timed!,haha).
We camped out at the helicopter landing area,so it was quite nice.haha..There were clean toilets as well.hehe..And we slept like a log.zzzzz..
Energy rating: 9/1o
Fun rating: 9/10
Comfy rating: 6.5/10
DAY FOUR
Wake up! We had our first expedition where we are put in-charge with very minimal guidance from the instructors-Vivian and Haizul.. First we had our energizers games and PT led by Redzwan.
Then, we went for our land expedition-trekking with time as our limitation factor. I was the sweeper with Afifah. The first route, we met with a junction and Zul and me felt that we should turn right(instinct) and we did..Then we met with another junction and we went straight and met with a dead end and we had to U-turn and then went to another way and reach our destination to the German girl shrine. We had about 4 stops all together. The toughest part for me was to climb up slippery,muddy track with numb left foot.We reached the highest peak of Pulau Ubin. The scenery was magnificent and I teased that I want my honeymoon to be there,and some of them said "with the company of mosquito and stuffs?"haha..The whole expedition, we had a mini karaoke session.Me,Zul,Redzwan,Nurul,Maisha,Humairah sang almost throughout the trekking! Then I was called Mommy of the group all of the sudden( I dont know how it came about).. Then we were given another challenge which is to build a raft in 45 mins(i have no idea how to,esp tying so i help out in tightening etc).We finished in an hour or so,haha..
The structure(poles) was 99% stabilise but our barrels were not tied well though,haha..We had to have everyone up on the raft and we started with the lightest peepz,when it came to Fathona to climb up, Haizul teased again(He so bias towards our group-me,nurul and fathona).hahaa..then came my turn to go up,the group was stabilising the raft and took quite a time when that Banglah starts to splash water all over my face that I couldnt see!eergh! I retaliate but he dodges,of course..(nvm,if I see him again,he has to watch out,jokingly,haha) There I was on the raft,wow!haha..
I helped Jean up and her foot smacked accidentally on my face and my reaction was apparently funny to Haizul that he laughed so contangiously that Zul also started to laugh!haha..(tak baik seh). Then after enjoying the beautiful scenery at the quarry,everyone jumps down to the water and started to untie it.
My shoe kept coming off when I swim,haha..Thanks to Melinda and Zul who came to the rescue of my shoe.(like Cinderella,in an unglam way though)..I was the last Eng Soon to go up to the shore.haha..
Then, we continued our land expedition to go back to our 3rd campsite(helicopter one)to return our floater(Livingstone and Hilarry)..When I was organising the floater,I overheard my name mentioned in the conversation of Nurul,Redzwan and Haizul. Then I found out that they were teasing me that I should not be invited to Haizul's wedding cuz of my crazy nature,hey!haha..
Imagine I sing at his wedding,confirm he laughed at me one!..His fiancee name is Cheryl..
Then, Fathona passes me the bagpack(thanks for helping to carry it for 75% of the trip) and I was the sweeper with Shawn,had a nice chatting time with him and sharing our quotes in our language(malay and chinese)..Vivian came to me and pull me down, teasing me that I'm so jumpy and hyper,haha..Then we chatted and get to know one another.The funniest part was that when Vivian and Haizul went to turn another way, I said bye to Vivian.I realised our navigator, Fathi took a wrong turn and inform the rest but not everyone heard it and ended up taking a longer route..
The last night!!!We had a lot to cook and gave some to Bo Seng.haha..Haizul gave us tip on frying the luncheon meat and I did..it was nice but i dont like it cuz it's salty but it blends well with plain rice or bread..Then we had a lot of maggi left and I offered $3 bucks to ZUL, HAFIZ and $4 to REDZWAN to finish it(havent give them yet though,haha)..We packed up,washed up.. Then I saw a tall tanned guy coming towards us and he looked like a Bangla(no offense okay) then I "whispered" to Nurul and fathona(apparently my whispersss has not been soft and he-Haizul heard) That's how the nickname came about..And he nicknamed me Maria(domestic helper) and asked me to clean up poncho.hmph!
We were all hoping that they allows us to sleep at the dorm since it was already 11pm but nope,we went to our another campsite but it was nice and comfortable despite the fact that it was at the start of the forest..We slept comfortably well that night.zzzzzzzz
Energy rating: 10/10
Fun rating: 10/10
Comfortable rating: 8/10
DAY FIVE
Then I had a little stomachache and rushed to the toilet and forgot about my portable mosquito coil there!!!!!oh man..
I wore a police dry fit black shirt and my "hawaiaan" bermuda bought at Hongkong and Haizul laughed madly and called me out for me to "parade"..He also said if take a picture of mine like that,he will laugh no doubt..crazy..
We then had energizer games(different ones,of course) called modernisation of culture(or sth like tt)We have the Red Indians, Ah Lians, Cowboy and Geishas..I won the scissors paper stone game but since it me!,Haizul gave our group the role of a Geisha!!haha..
Another game was about transformation(egg-chicken-eagle-man-superman-wonderwoman-immortal)..I was one of the ten immortal,was teased again of course!without fail one..(guess this is how it feels to have a big brother)haha..
Then, we got ready for our jetty jump!!fee-wit.. I was actually quite nervous but just crazily jump up and down and got ready at the end of the plank. We were asked to shout for what we want and jump. Even before I shout, Haizul and Vivian teased that my shout will be " I want to have 6 kids!haha"..but nah, I wanted to shout something else but this is what came out " I want to be a politician!" and ploooosh, I was in the water and I shouted, dont forget to vote for me!haha..it was crazy fun!One by one everyone came.. Suhaimi was the funny one with his wish! He said " I want to be get a scholarship and see all of you in heaven"..haha..meaning after he got the scholarhip,we'll die.(we all know he dont mean it that way but at that point of time,it sounded funny)..
Then we swam back to the shore and some of us started to "row" Fikri and sang "Row row your boat....."(edited version) and Fikri teases by adding " Fikri starts to pee" then we pushed him away(laughingly).. We were on land and Haizul washes all of us with hose and when it is my turn and Nurul,he started to any-o-how wash me..Everyone started to laugh at our antics.haa..
Then we bathed and changed and packed and etc etc..While cleaning up, it suddenly hits me that we are going back. I was choked with different emotions-happy,excited,sad etc..Indeed going to miss all the crazy fun I had in Ubin with the Bo Seng and Vivian, ENG SOONers and oklah,that Bangla too..
Then we had to re-enact the story of the German girl and I was the German girl speaking "Gute Morgan" then to add flava to it, Nurul then said "Eh girl speak English"(actually that point of time I know a few German lines and tt's why we did that)..When I was the "dead" girl, they wanted to literally carry me but they didnt.phew(guess I'm heavy anyways)..
Then we had a gathering of relections and sharing while our dear Mr Haizul cooked something for us(with purpose of course), the mixture of peanuts,oreos,raisins,butter(acts as a catalyst) represents our unique tastes of personality..There, I started to share what others dont see in me and it reflects the HIDDEN part of me in the JOHARI'S WINDOW..Then, Haizul shared a sad.love and meaningful story about a boy who was buying his sister(she passed on during the accident)favourite toy and a beautiful white rose for his dying mum(accident) and gave a picture of himself so that she'll remember him.. It daunts on me how many times have I said I love you or Thank You to the people I love..Then,I dont know but tears starts to well up and i choke as I remember of my late grandfather whom I love and didnt get to say I love you!............................................................................................................................................................
We went to the souvenir shop and bought two shirts and a pencil box..didnt bring enough money le..
Ok..Then we got back our phones,wallets(valuables) and ez link card..We were all sitting in a circle and Haizul knowingly passed my ez link card for everyone to see..eergh..but it's okay cuz who cares how i look anyways.haha...Then came the "closing ceremony" where we are suppose to give certificated to the rightful owner of the certs we are holding on.I got my own name and had to give back and get someone else name..Zul got mine and I got Cindy's..
Since we got back our phones, guess what people starts to do??other than calling loved ones??CAMWHORING!!!!!haha..crazy..I took a pictures with everyone and when it came to Haizul, he didnt smile properly..hey!!!hahaa..nvm,naughty bom-bom..
On the ship we took more pictures and it dawned on me again that I havent said goodbye and apologize if I'm too cuckoo to that Bangla,haha.I meant although I kept teasing,he was a great fun and really had a good character as a big brother sey..(btw,im the eldest,tt's why)..Took pictures with Vivian,going to miss her too....
Then all of us took a bus and aligted at a bustop where we have to walk to COMPASS POINT..We were like "What the heck, we trek so many, so this is nothing for us"haha..eksyen!We ate at Banquet.I didnt finish my food of course but drank two cups of drink,mama sita.haha..then journey home with Herry,Cheryl,Kamal and Hafiz...
HOME SWEET HOME(with lots of laundry)haha..slept at 8pm until 9am...zzz
" In life, possesion is not everything but experiencing is greater than ever"
-fadzila-
And there I was in a group called ENG SOON! Our group comprises of a fusion of students from MI. All of us have different personality, strengths. We realises the importance of working out differences and tap on our strengths to achieve greater heights!Oh yar, not forgetting our tanned, tall instructor Haizul(Bangla!!haaha)..Well, although we kept teasing him and all(esp me), he is indeed a great instructor who allows us have the opportunity to break out of our comfort zone and explore different things. His guidance is done interestingly and always ends up in quotes or story.
DAY ONE
We were all divided into two groups- Eng Soon and Bo Seng..My group Eng Soon consists of 16 unique individuals. Went to our first campsite and settle our stuff at the storeroom. Started to pack our tents, ponchos etc. We had our very first cooked dinner made by us. It was a well done cooked rice, chicken curry, peanuts, mushrooms with baked beans and a quench-thirst drink of TANGO(energy drink)Then we went for our first challenge! High element. It was about 7 logs horizontally lying and going upwards. My partner in crime is Fathona and our lovely belayers were Hafiz and Zul.(thanks guys).We managed to reach to the top(with some difficulties at the last log but everyone cheered me on with ANUAR ZAIN name!lol) and I made my victory cheerleading stand,haha.Then, I had my first mosquito bite. Guess where?? It was at my eye lid,haha..Next, set out to our 2nd campsite in the forest. The "toilet" is a first class one where we have to dig out a small hole on the ground and do it there,in between two lightsticks.hhee. Our tent mates are me,Fathona,Nurul,Mitch and Cheryl!
Energy rating: 6.5/10
Fun Rating: 6/10
Comfort Rating: 5/10
DAY TWO
We started to pack our tent and go back to our first campsite where I release all my neccessary stuffs,haha. Then we had our morning PT and energizers games, I was so hyped up and crazy playing the worm game,haha..Was in the semi-final,cheh!haha..Then I lost and accidentally shouted "Mak kau"(I dont meant it in a vulgar way,everyone started to tease me with that,including ppl I dont know)Then we had our first morning circles where there were reflections and sharing by all of us. There, we realises that the Yr 1 and Yr2s are like somewhat separated hence Haizul suggest that some of us could be the catalyst for the group. He then shared us a nice and interesting piece with the title "Mirror". By the way, the morning circle was held at a big ship(on land,okay,haha) like the one at the Pirates of the Carribbean!(JOHNNY DEPP-Captain Jack Sparrow!!)..
Followed by 2 games about problems. One is a game where there were many strings of different lengths(representing the many suggestions a group has) attached to a metal ring(represent a problem). The next one was a a plastic bag with quite a few of holes (representing the problems) and a ball which is to circle around the problem without dropping into the problem-hole..
We had a jotter book to write in our objectives, rules and regulations and most of us started to use the magic pens, markers etc to decorate our shoe, caps(including me)..
Then, we got ready for our sea expedition which is kayaking for about 5km to reach to our next campsite at Jelutong. My parner-in-crime is Fathona and she is a great teacher to me and patient too.thanks!..Then we set up our tent and went to the long-distance toilet. The water was murky-brownish coloured but who cares?haaha. Then we went back and ate a dinner cooked by our lovely friends-Maggie Mee with many ingredients. We washed the dishes at the sea.Me,fathona,Nurul and Maria felt like the traditional ladies washing back then,haha..sexy!..
Then, we went to sleep where I had my first encounter with sandflys and mosquito bites(not that many though). We had our santry duty from 430am to 530am, we girls sat down on a poncho and started to share our thoughts. Mitch- future successful lawyer,Cheryl- working at the RSAF or an accountant, Fathona- newscaster(me too!haha..) Nurul- still deciding but wish her all the best too!..
Energy rating:8/10
Fun Rating:7.5/10
Comfort Rating:4/10
DAY THREE
We set out for our another set of sea expedition which is about 13km kayaking around Pulau Ubin. It was crazy,tiring but indeed a great fun!..Our kayak(Fathona and myself) were the in charge of the port side, ensuring that no one crosses our boundary and hit the coastline or anything and we had another port side peeps which is Mila and Sumi. Our lovely navigator was Shawn, starboard side were Zul and Hamizah and our sweeper was Reeka.
We had some difficulties encountered as a whole in the beginning of the expedition(switching of partners, kept rafting up etc).. The weather was so scorchingly hot babeh,haha. I kept putting on sun screen especially on my face until that "Banglah" Haizul teased me la.Some called me "geisha tak menjadi"(geisha with no hope.haha). We had our lunch at the sea as well,it was funny and crazy because we had to raft up and attached to the speedboat but we kept drifting due to the waves.haha..
Then we continued and sand along the way,any songs we know we "hantam"(just sing) and this includes singing school song, national day songs.haha. We were suppose to reach by 130pm but we reached around 2sthpm..As we reached the land, it started to rain HEAVILY!..Thank God..Now I have a new tanline but my face were(alhamdulilah) saved,haha..but it looks funny as a combination though!haha..
Then we washed up at our first campsite and all of us felt "unstable" in the sense that we felt like swaying(due to kayaking so long). We had a dinner cook-off,it was fun and crazily crazy..haha..It was ENG SOON CUISINE! Then we shared the food with our lovely Bo Seng!..
The rain didnt stop and we went to a room to learn about Johari's Window(OPEN,BLIND,HIDDEN and UNKNOWN). Then we talked about car parts and how we relates to it. I chose the steering wheel.hehe.. ENG SOON came up with an identity of "AN EYE" where we see through differences and work towards a common objectives!(Maria inspired the identity due to the fact that 3/4 of ENG SOONers wear specs,haha)..
This followed by a mini game where two individual are to walk through the dark forest without any torchlights or any forms of lights-tests our courage and integrity as well. It was not bad,Fathona and me went and when we were hiking up a trail, Fathona realises there were stairs on the left side of our trail,haha..We reached our destination is 6.07mins(i timed!,haha).
We camped out at the helicopter landing area,so it was quite nice.haha..There were clean toilets as well.hehe..And we slept like a log.zzzzz..
Energy rating: 9/1o
Fun rating: 9/10
Comfy rating: 6.5/10
DAY FOUR
Wake up! We had our first expedition where we are put in-charge with very minimal guidance from the instructors-Vivian and Haizul.. First we had our energizers games and PT led by Redzwan.
Then, we went for our land expedition-trekking with time as our limitation factor. I was the sweeper with Afifah. The first route, we met with a junction and Zul and me felt that we should turn right(instinct) and we did..Then we met with another junction and we went straight and met with a dead end and we had to U-turn and then went to another way and reach our destination to the German girl shrine. We had about 4 stops all together. The toughest part for me was to climb up slippery,muddy track with numb left foot.We reached the highest peak of Pulau Ubin. The scenery was magnificent and I teased that I want my honeymoon to be there,and some of them said "with the company of mosquito and stuffs?"haha..The whole expedition, we had a mini karaoke session.Me,Zul,Redzwan,Nurul,Maisha,Humairah sang almost throughout the trekking! Then I was called Mommy of the group all of the sudden( I dont know how it came about).. Then we were given another challenge which is to build a raft in 45 mins(i have no idea how to,esp tying so i help out in tightening etc).We finished in an hour or so,haha..
The structure(poles) was 99% stabilise but our barrels were not tied well though,haha..We had to have everyone up on the raft and we started with the lightest peepz,when it came to Fathona to climb up, Haizul teased again(He so bias towards our group-me,nurul and fathona).hahaa..then came my turn to go up,the group was stabilising the raft and took quite a time when that Banglah starts to splash water all over my face that I couldnt see!eergh! I retaliate but he dodges,of course..(nvm,if I see him again,he has to watch out,jokingly,haha) There I was on the raft,wow!haha..
I helped Jean up and her foot smacked accidentally on my face and my reaction was apparently funny to Haizul that he laughed so contangiously that Zul also started to laugh!haha..(tak baik seh). Then after enjoying the beautiful scenery at the quarry,everyone jumps down to the water and started to untie it.
My shoe kept coming off when I swim,haha..Thanks to Melinda and Zul who came to the rescue of my shoe.(like Cinderella,in an unglam way though)..I was the last Eng Soon to go up to the shore.haha..
Then, we continued our land expedition to go back to our 3rd campsite(helicopter one)to return our floater(Livingstone and Hilarry)..When I was organising the floater,I overheard my name mentioned in the conversation of Nurul,Redzwan and Haizul. Then I found out that they were teasing me that I should not be invited to Haizul's wedding cuz of my crazy nature,hey!haha..
Imagine I sing at his wedding,confirm he laughed at me one!..His fiancee name is Cheryl..
Then, Fathona passes me the bagpack(thanks for helping to carry it for 75% of the trip) and I was the sweeper with Shawn,had a nice chatting time with him and sharing our quotes in our language(malay and chinese)..Vivian came to me and pull me down, teasing me that I'm so jumpy and hyper,haha..Then we chatted and get to know one another.The funniest part was that when Vivian and Haizul went to turn another way, I said bye to Vivian.I realised our navigator, Fathi took a wrong turn and inform the rest but not everyone heard it and ended up taking a longer route..
The last night!!!We had a lot to cook and gave some to Bo Seng.haha..Haizul gave us tip on frying the luncheon meat and I did..it was nice but i dont like it cuz it's salty but it blends well with plain rice or bread..Then we had a lot of maggi left and I offered $3 bucks to ZUL, HAFIZ and $4 to REDZWAN to finish it(havent give them yet though,haha)..We packed up,washed up.. Then I saw a tall tanned guy coming towards us and he looked like a Bangla(no offense okay) then I "whispered" to Nurul and fathona(apparently my whispersss has not been soft and he-Haizul heard) That's how the nickname came about..And he nicknamed me Maria(domestic helper) and asked me to clean up poncho.hmph!
We were all hoping that they allows us to sleep at the dorm since it was already 11pm but nope,we went to our another campsite but it was nice and comfortable despite the fact that it was at the start of the forest..We slept comfortably well that night.zzzzzzzz
Energy rating: 10/10
Fun rating: 10/10
Comfortable rating: 8/10
DAY FIVE
Then I had a little stomachache and rushed to the toilet and forgot about my portable mosquito coil there!!!!!oh man..
I wore a police dry fit black shirt and my "hawaiaan" bermuda bought at Hongkong and Haizul laughed madly and called me out for me to "parade"..He also said if take a picture of mine like that,he will laugh no doubt..crazy..
We then had energizer games(different ones,of course) called modernisation of culture(or sth like tt)We have the Red Indians, Ah Lians, Cowboy and Geishas..I won the scissors paper stone game but since it me!,Haizul gave our group the role of a Geisha!!haha..
Another game was about transformation(egg-chicken-eagle-man-superman-wonderwoman-immortal)..I was one of the ten immortal,was teased again of course!without fail one..(guess this is how it feels to have a big brother)haha..
Then, we got ready for our jetty jump!!fee-wit.. I was actually quite nervous but just crazily jump up and down and got ready at the end of the plank. We were asked to shout for what we want and jump. Even before I shout, Haizul and Vivian teased that my shout will be " I want to have 6 kids!haha"..but nah, I wanted to shout something else but this is what came out " I want to be a politician!" and ploooosh, I was in the water and I shouted, dont forget to vote for me!haha..it was crazy fun!One by one everyone came.. Suhaimi was the funny one with his wish! He said " I want to be get a scholarship and see all of you in heaven"..haha..meaning after he got the scholarhip,we'll die.(we all know he dont mean it that way but at that point of time,it sounded funny)..
Then we swam back to the shore and some of us started to "row" Fikri and sang "Row row your boat....."(edited version) and Fikri teases by adding " Fikri starts to pee" then we pushed him away(laughingly).. We were on land and Haizul washes all of us with hose and when it is my turn and Nurul,he started to any-o-how wash me..Everyone started to laugh at our antics.haa..
Then we bathed and changed and packed and etc etc..While cleaning up, it suddenly hits me that we are going back. I was choked with different emotions-happy,excited,sad etc..Indeed going to miss all the crazy fun I had in Ubin with the Bo Seng and Vivian, ENG SOONers and oklah,that Bangla too..
Then we had to re-enact the story of the German girl and I was the German girl speaking "Gute Morgan" then to add flava to it, Nurul then said "Eh girl speak English"(actually that point of time I know a few German lines and tt's why we did that)..When I was the "dead" girl, they wanted to literally carry me but they didnt.phew(guess I'm heavy anyways)..
Then we had a gathering of relections and sharing while our dear Mr Haizul cooked something for us(with purpose of course), the mixture of peanuts,oreos,raisins,butter(acts as a catalyst) represents our unique tastes of personality..There, I started to share what others dont see in me and it reflects the HIDDEN part of me in the JOHARI'S WINDOW..Then, Haizul shared a sad.love and meaningful story about a boy who was buying his sister(she passed on during the accident)favourite toy and a beautiful white rose for his dying mum(accident) and gave a picture of himself so that she'll remember him.. It daunts on me how many times have I said I love you or Thank You to the people I love..Then,I dont know but tears starts to well up and i choke as I remember of my late grandfather whom I love and didnt get to say I love you!............................................................................................................................................................
We went to the souvenir shop and bought two shirts and a pencil box..didnt bring enough money le..
Ok..Then we got back our phones,wallets(valuables) and ez link card..We were all sitting in a circle and Haizul knowingly passed my ez link card for everyone to see..eergh..but it's okay cuz who cares how i look anyways.haha...Then came the "closing ceremony" where we are suppose to give certificated to the rightful owner of the certs we are holding on.I got my own name and had to give back and get someone else name..Zul got mine and I got Cindy's..
Since we got back our phones, guess what people starts to do??other than calling loved ones??CAMWHORING!!!!!haha..crazy..I took a pictures with everyone and when it came to Haizul, he didnt smile properly..hey!!!hahaa..nvm,naughty bom-bom..
On the ship we took more pictures and it dawned on me again that I havent said goodbye and apologize if I'm too cuckoo to that Bangla,haha.I meant although I kept teasing,he was a great fun and really had a good character as a big brother sey..(btw,im the eldest,tt's why)..Took pictures with Vivian,going to miss her too....
Then all of us took a bus and aligted at a bustop where we have to walk to COMPASS POINT..We were like "What the heck, we trek so many, so this is nothing for us"haha..eksyen!We ate at Banquet.I didnt finish my food of course but drank two cups of drink,mama sita.haha..then journey home with Herry,Cheryl,Kamal and Hafiz...
HOME SWEET HOME(with lots of laundry)haha..slept at 8pm until 9am...zzz
" In life, possesion is not everything but experiencing is greater than ever"
-fadzila-
Sunday, September 21, 2008
wondering..pondering..is this it?
Have you ever wonder that you think that "yes,this may be it!" but to finally realise that it may not be. As a saying goes "what meant to be, will be meant to be and what's not,is not".It may sound a little too cliche but it seems to be true at times. Things are moving in your way and you feel that finally something good and true will go on smoothly in your life but it is not always in that case. What more if you lose that "it" because of someone/something you are close to? It may be frustrating and sometimes, unfair? Who can deny that some people do have the advantage over others. Be it looks,qualifications,charisma and the lists goes on.
Many ponder over their plight and keep wondering whether they might ever find what they are/have been looking for?.
There, the opportunity finally come and you think that this is it! But no! It makes a "U" turn for it saw something "better". And there you are wondering what you did to deserve such devastating "truth". Some people are "born" lucky and some have to work hard for it.Is life then fair? Well,what is fair anyways? There are many genuine gems out there that is not being appreciated for there are many who are deceived by fake gems who outstands for some reasons that is seen by the blurry eyes of many. In Season 1 Ugly betty show, betty has always been the one who is the bubbly girl with great personality but is potrayed as "ugly" and her sister who has guys swoon over by her looks but says that she has to make that kind of first impression so that people will remember her. well, many ponder to whom(the character) we could relate ourself to.
Life could be full of suprises.Wondering and pondering over matters whether it is trivial or huge is ineviatable. Deal with it and immerse yourself in the process of it. Things happens for a reason and we are the determinants of life-deciding which path to use and all.
" This morning is filled with dew
Feeling the breeze carassing me
All I can think is of you
For the way you looked at me
But now i realise
There's nothing to skip a beat for
Guess mine is not the lucky eyes
That you gazed upon before
Nothing could come out of it
But never will I stop looking
To hope there's someone out there to meet
For now, I'll be wondering and pondering
"Is this it?"
" Many of life failures are people who did not realise how close they were to success when they gave up" Thomas Edison
Many ponder over their plight and keep wondering whether they might ever find what they are/have been looking for?.
There, the opportunity finally come and you think that this is it! But no! It makes a "U" turn for it saw something "better". And there you are wondering what you did to deserve such devastating "truth". Some people are "born" lucky and some have to work hard for it.Is life then fair? Well,what is fair anyways? There are many genuine gems out there that is not being appreciated for there are many who are deceived by fake gems who outstands for some reasons that is seen by the blurry eyes of many. In Season 1 Ugly betty show, betty has always been the one who is the bubbly girl with great personality but is potrayed as "ugly" and her sister who has guys swoon over by her looks but says that she has to make that kind of first impression so that people will remember her. well, many ponder to whom(the character) we could relate ourself to.
Life could be full of suprises.Wondering and pondering over matters whether it is trivial or huge is ineviatable. Deal with it and immerse yourself in the process of it. Things happens for a reason and we are the determinants of life-deciding which path to use and all.
" This morning is filled with dew
Feeling the breeze carassing me
All I can think is of you
For the way you looked at me
But now i realise
There's nothing to skip a beat for
Guess mine is not the lucky eyes
That you gazed upon before
Nothing could come out of it
But never will I stop looking
To hope there's someone out there to meet
For now, I'll be wondering and pondering
"Is this it?"
" Many of life failures are people who did not realise how close they were to success when they gave up" Thomas Edison
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SG26 Pantry time
fun times we had(28/05/08)
The "soccer" girls for the day
Fyra(7)-Gabriel,Fadz(5)-Nuri,Fatin(18)-Nas
